I am turning 30 in a few days, so I’ve been reflecting on what this milestone represents in my life. There are two ways I can look at it: a) I can ignore it, passing it off as another insignificant year passing, or b) I can stop ignoring my natural tendency to over analyze everything and, well, analyze it. I’ll give you one guess which I’m going to do.

I’ve been especially reflective the past month, especially with the anniversary of the death of a lifelong friend. Going back to my old neighborhood always fills me with a sad feeling of nostalgia that I can’t quite figure out. My childhood was pretty good; there are very few demons lurking between the houses or in the ravine we spent hours playing in. So why all the sadness? It’s a five minute drive to my old neighborhood, so it’s not like I left town for years and am just now faced with my past.

After spending way too much time thinking about it, I realize that my life is taking a turn onto a different path. I don’t know where this is going to lead me, so my instinct is to shy away from the new and cling to the old and familiar. It may have nothing to do with turning 30, but it is an interesting coincidence.

My early 20s were confusing and painful. I went through some shit that I wouldn’t wish on anyone, yet I realize that if I hadn’t I would probably be a strung out alcoholic with a slew of STDs. And my wife wouldn’t have wanted my sorry ass. So I lucked out big time. My late 20s, however, were wonderful in comparison, and I learned a lot about myself with the help of my aforementioned wifelette. Thanks, lady.

There will hopefully be some very exciting and wonderful things coming into my life in the next year, fun times and hard work that will bring my wife and I into a new phase in our lives. As I leave my turbulent 20s behind, I am looking forward to the challenges of the future with an open mind. And a bigger paycheck. The future is expensive.